Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An investigator!
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a shark? Frostbite!
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
What did one hat say to the other? You stay here, I'll go on ahead.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? "Supplies!"
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels.
How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogey in it!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
How does a train eat? It goes chew, chew!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite with a bite!
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
Why did the tomato go out with a prune? Because it couldn't find a date.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it was feeling crumbly.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
Why did the bicycle fall asleep? It was two-tired.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus.
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a shark? Frostbite.
Why was the belt sent to jail? For holding up the pants.
What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
Why did the tomato turn yellow? Because it saw the banana peel.
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crumbly.
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Fo' drizzle.
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.
Why did the duck go to the movies? To watch the latest flick.
What do you call a group of cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band.
Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.
Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a watermelon.
